Stressucation! A Debrief of Stress Harmful Effects And 5 Organic Tips to DeStress

We always hear about how stress isn’t good us. People are always telling us that we need to relax (which if you’re anything like me, that irritates you and stresses you out more). But why? There of those of us that are called “stressors.” Our stress holds us together. As long as we have a 10 hour work shift, errands to run, bills to pay (which is why we have to work 10 hour work shifts), and a million other things to do we seem to be held pretty much together. It’s not like we choose to be this way, we just are. Because that’s how our life is. Because let’s face it: Being an adult is stressful and it’s rare that we find those moments when we don’t have at least one thing stressing us out. But it’s just stress right? Sure maybe you don't feel the best emotionally, and may have a hard time getting your thoughts together but the fact of the matter is stressors  that may be harming ourselves physically on top of our obvious emotional/mental problems.

Not only does constant stress make it harder to focus and function, but stress also lowers our immune system. Without getting into exact science of it, stress inhibits our immune system, as well as our ability to heal, as well as opening up the door for vulnerability to some major life-changing diseases such as Type 2 Diabetes, some autoimmune diseases, and osteoporosis. Scary right? So how do people who have stress, especially the chronic stressors, get some relief? And how do they get it without taking  anxiety medication or other medications that may ‘zombie-fy’ them? Well, here’s a few non-chemical tips to get that de-stress everybody needs!

• Start with a Tea. Everyone knows that one person out there who just cannot start their day without that morning coffee. If they don’t get their coffee they are cranky, groggy, slow and well… Coffee-zilla. Don’t worry. This segment is not about giving that cup of morning joe up. Even though coffee isn’t exactly great for you, one cup a day isn’t going to cause major damage. However if you have more than one, maybe you should consider replacing that second cup with a tea! It’s just as good, and way better for your body. And those of you who are smoothie breakfast people, or don’t really have a morning beverage ceremonially, you too ought to consider a tea. A cup of chamomile tea, chai tea, or green tea will get those stress feelings under control.
• Bust-A-Move. We are all tired of hearing our doctors to tell us to exercise. And as an adult, there's only a small portion of us who have time between work, family and life to put in a work out. And let’s be real here - there’s a select few people who like exercising. Exercising is not as bad as it seems though! Exercise is kind of like meditating for those that cannot empty their mind to meditate. Once one begins to exercise, after a while, all your focus goes to the one action that you’re doing as your body works harder and harder to complete the tasks you’re telling it to do. And when your body gets to working like that, endorphins (a scientific word for ‘happy’ feelsy stuff in your body) begin to flow. And believe it or not, after your workout you will feel more relaxed, be in a better mood despite yourself, and even though you might be sweaty and out of breath; answers that you might have been struggling with become more clear. So maybe you don’t want to go on a diet and exercise to lose weight (probably to just spite your Dr. It’s okay we all do it.), just find time for 30 minutes a day of whatever physical activity you enjoy (that gets your heart pumping and your sweat pouring) to keep those stress levels down!
• Clear your mind! Some people can’t meditate while sitting still. It’s just not possible for them. For some people they don’t have the discipline to not fidget, others don’t have the attention span, and let’s face it - focusig on nothing or just the feeling of your nose is hard. The term ‘meditate’ is used loosely here. Meditation-in-motion is something that is being encouraged more and more. Meditate by doing something that relaxes you. Adult-Coloring books are becoming a rather well known thing, as coloring helps you focus on one action at a time, and when you get focused on it you lose track of thought of much else. Some people actually use running or walking as their meditation, focusing on burning calories or going a distance, keeping up a certain speed, or even just focusing on the sensation of their legs burning as they lift and step, the feeling of their foot hitting the ground or the sweat dripping down their face. Find an activity that allows you to focus on it, instead of everything that may or may not stress you out. And if you’re one of the few that has the ability to sit on a yoga-mat and focus on just your breathing then make sure you do it! A little breather every day will help you be able to feel more in control of your situation and your stress triggers.
• Crank it up! Everybody needs some music. Again music helps the body relax and release those feel-goods in your hormones. Music appreciation is stimulated by whatever brave waves it activates - or something like that. So whether you are a rocker, a bee-bopper, an oldies and goodies, or if you appreciate the sound of a good country tune, no matter what it is, play it.  As long as you like what you hearing, turn that music on and up whenever you can! And if you play an instrument, make sure you play it to your hearts content!
• Sleep is your friend - no matter how evasive it may seem. When your stressed, sleep isn’t exactly an easy thing to come by. But learn your body, put yourself on a scheduled regime so that your body becomes accustomed to sleeping at a certain time. Out of everything, this is probably the hardest thing to do. However if you are tired, you will not be able to manage your stress. So learn how to manage your sleep and get help for it if you must. A cup of chamomile tea with yarrow and passionflower will help you relax making your melatonin more effective.

How Closure Can Heal

I think it's reasonable to guess that almost everyone in the world has experienced a situation in which they have received no closure. Whether it be an incident, a relationship, an experience, an addiction or lifestyle, I believe we all have dealt with something that moved us deeply and created a wound in which refuses to close. In fact, I think it's safe to say majority of people have experience several things in their life in which closure seems out of reach.

The worst thing about not having closure is humans have a habit of being lured into a false sense security after so long. The wound on our hearts involving whatever situation we experienced scabs over and we think: "Okay. I'm over it. I'm healed. It doesn't hurt or bother me any more. I don't care about it." And we truly think that this is the case until something happens to cause the scab to tear and allow the pus from the festering wound to seep out in the open and assault our senses with the stench of infection. Do keep in mind I'm saying this figuratively.

I guess one good example is the situation I am currently in. My biological father was never there for me as a child, or my early adulthood. I suppose at the ripe age of 26, I am still currently still in young adulthood. As a child, I wanted his attention. As a teenager, I was hurt and angry. As an adult, I didn't think I cared any more - as I have a few very strong and solid male role models in my life to lead and guide me.  On my wedding day, I didn't think about my biological father at all. The  day I left my husband, all I wanted was authoritative father figures I currently have. I thought: "I'm okay. I turned out fine. I don't hate him any more, I don't want him around and I certainly do not care what happens."

But as I mentioned, sometimes things happen that rip open that scab and make you face the infection of animosity (or pain or anger or whatever it is that the situation you are faced with) from whatever it is in which you have no closure. And it's always a shocker. It rocks you back on your heels as if you were hit by a sudden force of pressure, and sometimes it could take days to actually sink in.

I was informed that my biological father is basically... dying to put it bluntly a week or two ago. When I was first informed I felt nothing. But as I thought about it, I realized I was on a time limit now to actually be okay with the situation. Was I okay with letting him die without telling him how much he's hurt me?

Am I okay with him not recognizing me as a person that he helped create and bring into this world ? And that I turned out to be pretty influential even though I keep my circles tight and very small?

I have come to the conclusion that perhaps I was not as healed as I have thought. I am reaching out to him... I guess even this blog post is a way of reaching out to him. Because I want him to know that I turned out fine without him. Because that is my closure. I want him to know that he hurt me. But I grew up fine in spite of it. I want to tell him I love him, I hate him, and I do not think that when he dies the tears I will cry will be out of sadness, but of regret of never really knowing him, and never being loved by him.

I have father figures who are proud of me, who I strive to make proud of me. And I am okay with that. I've come to terms with them and they love me and see me for me. And I love them.  However, everybody knows it's not the same.

Perhaps it is not the nicest closure to receive, to tell a dying man that he wasn't needed after all, and that he hurt people in his life. I'm sure as he's dying, every regret is coming to him in loads. Perhaps I am one of them in some way, shape or form. I only fear the regret of me will be my existence - but I will not let that bother me. I will tell him even though I love him, I hate him, and to not expect sadness of his death from me, only regret.

Because that will be my closure even though it's hard to say - especially since as a shaman I am to understand the neutral side of his own feelings and fears. As a daughter though, I will not spend the rest of my life hating a dead man for what he never tried to do and for what he never did. I will tell him how I feel, so that when he finally journeys into the afterlife, I do not keep him tethered by a chain of animosity, but rather one of neutral acknowledgment that he once existed and some where his spirit will continue to exist. That way I can proudly continue to say that I am a shaman, and I have strove and continue to conquer my own physical and emotional faults - so that I can continue to help people without being a hypocrite.

Because the only way to cure a wound like this is to get closure. And I strongly urge those who have something that keep them in the past, or keep them from moving forward and onto new and brighter things is to do just this: Seek closure. Let your words leak from the heart, and come rushing forth without hesitation. Because that is the only way you will get closure - and even if the situation does not go as you hope - at the end of the day you will still have closure.

The peace that comes with closure is a heavenly feeling, and it leaves the taste of progress lingering in your mouth.  Usually closure comes with a price, and the action to gain that closure feels like one of the hardest things you will have to do. And perhaps, like in my situation, the realization that you even need closure can be shocking and hard to come to terms with. But once it is done... it is completely done.

So go forth, and get your closure. You deserve it.

The Internal Compass

Always there's a point in our lives where we feel lost. Our faith gets shaken, we experience a loss that leaves us stranded and unsure of which way to step to move forward with our lives, sometimes we wake up one morning and realize we've become complacent and we just aren't happy floating with the tide anymore. Whatever the case is, a point will come when feel ourselves dragging our feet mentally, spiritually, physically and emotionally.

We forget what once made us smile, what made our hearts beat to the sound of our own drum. We forget the way it felt to soar above the forest canopy with our faith or confidence, to be running uphill towards something or anything. We lose track of the things we aspire for, and our inspiration dwindles down to a faint glow of a dying ember. 

So what do we do when we find ourselves treading water, being pulled against the tide of our souls? How do we overcome the sense of listlessness that gives us cabin fever in regards to our own lives and skins?  When we get to that point, it's usually too late, our discontent has grown to thick that it feels as if every part of our daily lives is like nails on a chalkboard. 

The important thing is to try and remember not to lash out. Don't take it out on your family or your loved ones.  You'll find that not lashing out is easier said than done. But it's important to practice is. Communicate with them. Often times we have no idea what is causing this sense of displacement, or discontent.  Sometimes it can take months or even years to figure out why you feel so lost. 

You would think, being an adult for as long as we have been it would be easy to figure out what is upsetting you. But the sense of feeling lost I'm referring to is like falling off of your path, tumbling down a cliff into a dark and muddy ravine. Sometimes we have no clue what caused us to lose our footing, or how we ended up where we ended, and worst of all we have no clue how to get back to the path we originally set ourselves on. 

Most of the time the problem lays within our heart, but as humans we try to think about our emotions logically with our minds. We ignore what our feelings are saying and we try to rationalize. A lot of times we make excuses as to why we must continue doing whatever it is that we're doing. We tell ourselves to just keep getting through it one day at a time, it'll get better. 

But it won't. Until we have figured out what is making us feel so lose, complacent and discontent with our lives it will not. Our hearts are our internal compass. Listen to your emotions, try to locate what is upsetting you. The sooner you get to the root of the problem, the sooner it is you will find your way back to being happy, and feeling as if we have found our way.

Again it could take months or even longer to find ourselves again. Figuring out the root of all the problems is the hardest part, but the longest part if solving the issue. Unfortunately what makes us feel displaced as people are often things that take a lot of time to solve, or things that feel impossible to reverse or rectify. Time, money, patience and determination, physical state of being, our own homeostasis. All of those are very difficult subjects, and not everyone has equal amounts of any of those things.

But follow your heart, don't ever tune out it's desires. It's our internal compass, and if you throw it away, you may not like where you end up.

The Tabooloid, Part 1: Religion

The Tabooloid, Part 1: Religion

Disclaimer:  This article is MEANT to be controversial. It’s meant to stir feelings. It’s meant to invoke a reaction out of people. But I really don’t care about your reaction. Keep it to yourself. The following article cannot be taken as stone. It is not preaching, it is not gospel, it’s not religion bashing or the encouragement of religion. It is simply words written after deep contemplation from a mind that sees more than the world than just is, who has been told things about the afterlife from other sources.  It is meant to be as profound and eye opening food for thought or you may take it as the ramblings of a crazy person. How one interprets this next article is up to you. I take no responsibility for any offense that is taken from my genuine experience and thought. If you message me or comment on here with any form of argument, I will tell you that you can get happy in the same pants you got sad in, because this is MY thoughts and it is just meant to help people think about things, and maybe better themselves in their beliefs. Also these thoughts are not directed at EVERYBODY who has a religion or who is an Atheist. You know what kind of person you are. And if you do or do not do the things mentioned in my written monologue (which doesn’t actually even scratch the surface about my thoughts on religion), you KNOW if this is directed at you or not. Do not take offense at my general outreach to people if you KNOW in your heart of hearts that you are not as follows. Because you may not do it, but others do. And if you DO, well, read the article and just know that you’re a jerk. And I hope this helps you stop in your tracks in the future when you’re about to be a jerk again, and redirect you in the right path.

Religion. It is meant to be a great and profound thing. It is the setting of goals or regulations or requirements of life to help those find their way to another place, their desired place after death. It is a word or way of life that helps people live their life to the way that their Creator wants them to. And to some, its a placation of fear and restlessness in life.  It is supposed to be a profound thing.  A way of teaching that educates people to be a profound gathering of believers who follow the ways of their Creator to find an eternity of peace and love after their passing here in this world.

Well let’s get something straight very quickly before I begin to break down the complexities of religion from my eyes. I do believe in our Creator. To some he is known as Allah, to others Buddha. To many he is known as Lord God Almighty or The Father. And there are other names that our Creator is known as. And with every name God is worshiped differently with different cultures and heritages. I fully believe in a higher power. I believe in the complexities and mysterious origins of a place called Heaven or Sanctuary. I also believe in Hell, and dark malevolent soul thirsty entities known as Demons.  I do not believe Heaven is up and Hell is down.  But I believe they are existent. Actually, I know they exist. And with every part of me, I thank our Creator. I will thank him, and love him under all of those names or none. For I believe they are one and the same.  I do not believe that different cultures and heritages and beliefs and ways of worship make each name any less significant than the other.

I guess that’s the benefit of not having a religion however. Because as some of you were reading that paragraph you were already judging me, saying that I was wrong, or I was going to hell, or I was blaspheming. And that is the ultimate flaw of religion. If you go onto Facebook, or other social media sites, you do not have to look very hard to find people going at each other with ugly words and closed minds for their difference of opinions - and to be quite frank and burst all of those bubbles - doing the exact OPPOSITE of what their God wants. Certainly, IF he's a benevolent being, he does not want to be used as the excuse for Christians to bash each other verbally and physically. And to be frank, it's kind of stupid to do so.

And do not argue with that, not even to yourself. All you have to do is scroll down your wall I am sure for a few hours, or you can venture into forums or type in a keyword, and you will find religious hate. There was a tumblr image that was going around Facebook for a while, a long list of “Christians” bashing Atheists with words that were as ugly as the hell they so cringe from.  “All Atheists should burn in hell.” “If the law allowed, I would shoot you all in the head with a 12 gage shotgun.” Those are the two quotes that really stuck in my mind, but there were more that were equally as ugly.

I’m not sure about you, but IF I were a benevolent God, that is not how I would want my worshippers to show their love or support of me. Last time I checked, religion was about a shepherd leading a flock. And if there is a lost lamb, shouldn’t that lamb be cared for and lead home instead of bashed for being geographically challenged? I mean, that’s what I ASSUME religion is SUPPOSED to be about. But hey, if your bible says be an asshole and say cruel and ugly things, displaying you for the asshole you are, then by all means. Go ahead. Your assholery is no one else’s problem but yours at the end of your life.

It’s funny how Religion, most religions, do not encourage such ugly, sinful words. And yet almost (ALMOST) every Christianaml is guilty of such things. Religion has turned into an ugly, hypocritical thing.  Catholics hate Protestants and will war with them until the end of time. Baptists and Jehovah’s Witness will continually tell each other the other is going to hell for their differences. Religion has been tainted, by crusades, wars, judgment, prejudices since the beginning of well..Religion.

The Crusades were an excuse to murder, crying out that “In the name of God” it was excusable (I am at least aware that in the bible it simply says: Thou shall not kill. No where does it have : (“Unless it is in my name, then Murder is perfectly acceptable”) But would it really be that surprising if it did?

 I do not read the bible, because in my line of work I take dark entities out of people. Possession is a very real thing. And more than once my family not reading the bible and memorizing its profound messages word for word has saved us. Not even three years ago my mother was possessed, and what helped me know the difference between her and the entity was the scripture it procured from her mouth.

That is not the only reason however. I found that the bible is untrustworthy. The bible, back before printers and copiers and computers ever existed, had to be hand written. Kings ordered scribes to copy down the bible by hand into books when needed. And if you think that the greed of the Monarchs was quenched by the fear of the wrath of our Creator, then you were not paying attention in history class. The bible has been manipulated for thousands of years to read in the order of whomever had the authority to do so since the beginning of religion. Chapters left out, words changed, paragraphs edited. The bible reads exactly how each religion chooses to read it. It has been warped into a tool of manipulation.

If there were to be a bible that I trust, it would be the Quran. However even still, I cannot read the passages with 100% certainty. For every book was written by human hand. And unfortunately, humans have proven themselves liars time and time again over existence.  

Another thing I find ridiculous is people who are religious-based is that whenever someone else has a problem, or they themselves find something that is a problem their answer is to pray. They tell each other that God will fix it, or that God would never hand someone something they couldn’t handle. They say that God has a plan for each and every one of us and that he is personally hand-manipulating everyone’s lives. People blame God and pray and ask why when they are having issues. They thank God when there is a extraordinary good thing.

I am going to remind you of something that is sort of…the prime purpose of humans. Behold, I will tell you  MAIN ingredient that our Creator mixed into his cauldron when he created us (other than blood, carbon, matter and icky gooey stuff on our insides). Free will. Free will dominates our world. That is so important. Free will makes you sin. Not the devil. Freewill makes you an asshole who says being gay is bad or atheists should die. Freewill puts you in the predicaments that you are in (and karma probably). Freewill gets you that promotion at work when you chose to work hard and proved your worth to your coworkers and supervisors. Freewill starts war under the excuse of religion. Free will makes that man find the courage to save that woman about to be hit by a car. Freewill makes heroes. Freewill makes villains. Free will makes us who we are. Freewill is what turns our world with greed or love. God does not do any of that.  Like any good parent who is displaying a dose of tough love to their child learning how to walk, our Creator sits back and watches us fall and stand over and over again. It is our choices to rise above and learn to run that gains his approval and love.

And if you think that God has time to personalize every single one of our lives you are clearly delusional. There are BILLIONS of people on earth. Do you HONESTLY think God is going to write out every single story on this earth? And what, the Devil just interjects every once in a while with fanfiction of his own? Seriously? 

Freewill. It makes us assholes. Or it makes us amazing. And that is totally up to each and every individual on their own. Stop blaming our Creator for the troubles in your life, and stop using him as an excuse. That is also a form of blasphemy.

Personally, I run on faith. I myself feel, as well as many other people do, that we do not need a church, a saint, a priest, or any other kind of religious leader or icon to talk to God. Faith is the belief of. And having the faith of is enough. You do your best to be a good person, do not hurt other people or torment Gods creatures. Take care of the Earth, and be kind. Help others. And pray to whom or whatever you believe in, and you will do fine… we are not meant to know. And it is presumptuous to think you know, or to tell others that they are wrong.  It is arrogant to think that you are so special that you are better than someone else, or your beliefs are better than anyone else’s.

….Now for you Atheists. Don’t think you’re getting off the hook that easily. I see a lot of religion hate from you folks too. And a lot of it seems to be based off of “I don’t believe in anything, and you’re stupid to believe if you do. Because SCIENCE.” OR It’s based off of “I hate Catholicism so I am going to be an Atheist just to spite everyone, and I’m going to bash God, and bash religion EVERY FUCKING CHANCE I GET.”

Yah. To those of you who are like that. Fuck you. Again. Your assholery is no one’s problem but yours, and that kind of attitude tells me you’re kind of a lonely person, because you’re probably hard to tolerate on a general basis, not just when talking about religion. Because you have a God complex despite your ‘lack’ of belief. And you think you’re better because you can pull up science that you probably have NO clue what the actual fuck you’re talking about as a justification for not believing in God and bashing those who might be a little bit more open minded that there are other things. I know plenty of people like you. You probably like to go on the internet and try to look smart and make people feel small too. Because that’s the kind of person you are. How very pathetic and lonely. By the way, I know a few Christian scientists, and they are just fine finding a balance between faith, or religion, and science.

To the other kinds of Atheists who generally have no idea what to believe, or don’t believe in anything because it seems…far-fetched.  You aren’t Atheist. You’re Agnostic. You just dunno what to believe.

Think of God, or Creator, Or whatever name you want to give the main God as the CEO of a business. He’s a paper pusher. He makes executive decisions on the state of the company based off of the information he receives from his managers.

Now these managers could be minor gods, Demi-Gods, Angels. Arch angels, or other kinds of deities that you might be interested. And below them are the supervisors. Guardians, familiars, spirits, mediators between worlds, Employees are perhaps the churches, and spiritual leaders of each different religion. And the consumers would be the believers, or the congregations. Perhaps it’s the same reverse up too, for those that choose the odd religion of Satanism (I mention it because I respect ALL religions equally, even if some scare me a little bit).

As I mentioned earlier, I run on Faith. The Creator is a CEO. Or maybe even a mob boss. He’s got homies. He’s got an entire arsenal of homies. Just find something to believe in. Believe in Kathulu is that is what rocks your boat. Or Alien Gods. Or Greek Gods. Or Native American Dieties. Or Chinese or Hindu or... WHATEVER!

All of these things, I truly believe are our Creators homies, or Managers. You don’t have to believe in the CEO or the Almighty. As long as you believe in SOMETHING, you will be just fine. Because a world without any kind of faith that there might be something better than this wretched, cruel world… is a dark dreary world indeed. There is an entire world full of different kinds of something for you to believe in. Look into it. Do some research. You'll find something that will make sense to you, or you won't, and you'll become Athiest. Which is okay too. 

And if you are happy not believing in anything, then good for you. Just try not to be an asshole to people who do. Because you’re not much better than the ‘hypocrites’ that you criticize every day if you judge them back.

To everyone who doesn’t fit exactly in this article I just want to say: good for you. You’re not doing something that caused a loud keyboarded girl to notice you.  To those who have Religions and follow it, and manage to keep yourself in good spirits, and don’t use Religion as an excuse to be a jerk to those who may or may not agree with you: You are obviously a good person. You’re just fine. Keep in mind that I’m not bashing Religion in any way shape or form. I’m not discouraging it. I’m just noting flaws that people seem to be taking to the bank as a reason to get a loan for a gun.  Keep doing what you’re doing, because you my friend, are the ideal kind of Christian. You’re rare and precious. And God bless you.